Wednesday, September 9, 2009

To Explain Where All of the S'mores Supplies Went...

Aaron seems to be having a little trouble adjusting to the demands of preschool. You know, coloring can be a real bitch sometimes. The other day when I picked him up, his teacher said that he was pretty upset for most of the day, and I was shocked because the first two days of school went by without any problem whatsoever. He was even mad on Monday because he wasn't going to get to go to school because of the holiday, and when he got up on Tuesday he was super excited to go, but somewhere along the lines I think the exhaustion of his new demanding schedule caught up with him and he started to snap a little; like mother, like son.

When I was driving him home I wasn't sure if I should bring it up or leave it alone, but I wanted to make sure he was alright, and so I ask him what went wrong. He started to tell me about how much he misses me when he is at school and the more he talked about it the more chocked up he got. I felt horrible. How do you explain to a four year old that this is something that he just has to do and that it is ultimately for his greater good?

So I was getting him ready for school yesterday and everything was fine until he started sobbing into his waffles about how much he misses me. I really didn't know what to say. I didn't want to say anything that would make the situation worse, but nothing was making it any better, and let me tell you, this is not Aaron. He has always been a very independent, determined little guy, but seeing him so vulnerable is ripping my heart to shreds.

For Aaron's sake I am not going to go into great detail about how dropping him off went, but I am pretty sure that as we walked the hall to his classroom I heard someone shout, "Dead man walking." His teacher assured me that she would call me if things got really bad, although I was skeptical that it could get any worse, and then I went home to eat as many microwave S'mores as I could fit into my mouth at one time. About two hours later when I hadn't heard anything from the school, I called to see how things were going. The secretary went to his room to check and when she came back on the line she said that everything was fine. Whew!

Now I wish that I could show you a picture of the faces of the teacher and her assistant when I walked into the door to pick him up because I am telling you, it was priceless. I knew immediately that things must have gone terribly wrong because that is how I usually look at the end of the day. Apparently, he had moments throughout the day when he was alright, but then those moments were shattered by incredible moments of wailing and gnashing of teeth. The teacher commented, "He is a very determined little guy." Um, yeah!

In short, I am emotionally exhausted. The thoughts of taking him to school today are too overwhelming to comprehend right now, and I am pretty sure that if he had it his way I would start homeschooling. All I can say is that I pray to God that things go well today because I am all out of S'mores supplies!


Jenny W. said...

I totally get where you're coming from! My situation is slightly different in that my son is nine and not "missing me" but we just moved our kids from public school to the local Catholic elementary this year. It's been a system shock for my son who is having a hard time adjusting to the new time schedule, more homework and new "regulations" like uniforms and weekly mass. Everyday he says he wants to go back to his old school despite the fact that he has yet to produce a compelling answer as to why. My husband and I know that this will benefit him in the long run and that this really is the best place for both of our kids but try telling a stubborn nine-year-old that! It upsets me that he feels this way and I wish I could make it "all better" (like a good mommy) but I can't. To me, it's like a storm I have to weather and hope that everything will end up all right in the end. Anyway, I hear you and empathize!! Hang in there :)

Amy said...

Thanks Jenny for the shoulder to complain on. I went to Catholic school for my entire education and I know that the schedule can be tough, but I think that there is a real opportunity for spiritual growth when you attend a school of faith. I hope that he adjusts soon. Best of luck.

Leslie said...

I react exactly the same way when I'm stressed. Eat S'mores. Or ANYTHING. I'm trying not to eat something I shouldn't right now. MOTHER FRICKIN BUCKEYES IN THE FRIDGE. Ugh! Why do I keep making them?