Monday, August 17, 2009

Help! I've Lost My Motivation and I Don't Know Where to Find It.

I'm currently in kind of a workout/weight loss slump. Back in January, my husband and I decided that it was time to take off some weight, and so we did. It wasn't easy. It was hard, really hard. It sucked more than anything has ever sucked before, but we did it. Neither one of us has hit our goal weight yet, but we have each lost about fifty pounds, and I can't even begin to describe how amazing that feels.

Earlier this month I ran in my first 5K. I still can't believe that I did it because this time last year I couldn't have run across the street to catch the ice cream truck, let alone 3.1 miles. In all honesty, I ran the first two miles, walked most of the last mile, and then finished running, but I still finished and that was the goal, to cross the finish line under my own power instead of being carried across on a stretcher shouting, "There ain't gonna be no rematch."

Anyhow, since the race has been over, I have found it a tad difficult to gather the motivation to work out. I want to, I think about it all day, but when the time comes for me to hit the treadmill or work out with Jillian Michaels, I have a hard time pushing myself to do it. By the way, Jillian doesn't actually come to my house to work out, I have her DVDs, but wouldn't that be awesome if she did? Maybe I shouldn't have clarified that and you could have thought, "Wow, she is so cool that Jillian Michaels actually goes to her house to train her. I totally want to follow her blog to revel in her coolness."

Not only am I not working out enough, but the diet has slipped a little too. In the beginning, we were very strict with what we ate. For a good six weeks we didn't eat out or cheat in any way. I confess that I did have impure thoughts about M&M's and Pepsi, but that was as far as it went, just thoughts. Ok, maybe I would visit them in the store, but I never touched them I swear. I have also been drinking way too much pop, diet, but still pop, and I have even been eating, wait for it...french fries. I know, for shame. I feel so dirty, and when I do manage to work out with a Jillian DVD, I feel like she knows what I have been up to, and she judges me.

I only have a little less than twenty pounds to go before I hit my recommended "healthy" weight and I am wondering if I can achieve that by the time my birthday rolls around in another six weeks. This year I am turning the big 3-0 and I can't think of a better way to kick off my thirties than by finally loosing the weight. Twenty pounds is probably a bit too ambitious in just six weeks, but I am hoping that if I embrace this challenge that I will at least be able to get back on track otherwise, I am going to have to do something drastic like have all of the fast food restaurants post my picture at the drive thru with a caption that reads, "Do not give this woman french fries."


Leslie said...

I had a major lapse in my diet and exercise. It started with BlogHer and it ended...well, it's ending. IT IS. I've been back to exercising every day again. But cookies. Damn, cookies. I made a batch today. Ugh. It's hard. Very, very hard. But Amy, you've accomplished so much. You slipped, but don't let it take you back to the bottom of the mountain. The top is within reach. You'll get there. Just a few more steps.